'In the midst of plenty we feel empty’

It’s been exactly 13 months since Mr. Vijay Menon spoke to us... changed our lives and moved our minds! 

We were all back in class wondering if all this is actually helping us...

When I wrote my previous blog on Vijay Menon’s lecture I was in high spirits... my blood was boiling to do something for the world around...to make a difference in at least one person’s life...to make a mark...to initiate a change...

But to be very frank I haven’t done anything that can be tagged as social service in the past 13 months and I was nearly ashamed to be realising the reality and sitting in his class this time. However I was gifted with thoughts on what exactly is meant by social service...

Social service is not just about giving financial aid to the needy but about creating a strong value system within oneself which will help people around to change their lives. To inspire someone be the deed or show the deed or personify the deed is what the speaker said!

Further he quoted an IIM-A graduate who said ‘in the midst of plenty we feel empty’. These are such beautifully strong words that most of us experience in our lives and never got an answer to why we feel so. As I had mentioned in one of my earlier blogs (Gifted hands) I feel the worst when everything is fine in my life and when I can’t pray from my heart. This statement by the IIM graduate reinforced that thought further into me. I feel empty when I score high in my exams, when I have all my friends around me with warmth and happiness, when my family is safe and sound, when my teachers are knowledgeable etc

In all these situations I feel the most privileged and forget that there is a world outside deprived of these luxuries. I believe this gap between them and me creates the emptiness.

I recollect an instance from my childhood when I accompanied my parents to an orphanage for mentally retarded and crippled children. Unlike the usual orphanages this one is exclusively for abnormal children who have been abandoned by their families because they don’t have the money to support their treatment and medication. As soon as we entered the ward, I held my mother’s hand tight as there were children in grotesque postures moving around in the floor. There were 2 rows of beds in the ward and the Sister in charge explained to us about the schedule these children followed in a day. We kept walking with the sister till I heard a small baby cry continuously from one of the beds. When we turned around the Sister said that the baby was just 6 months old and had a stroke and she is unable to move. Six months is too small to start talking hence she cries aloud whenever someone passes by to grab their attention. The sisters explained to us how she cannot be with the baby always and give her attention due to her daily chores and hinted that it will be great if we could spend some time sitting next to the baby. Someone’s presence made a lot of difference in that child’s life.

There were several such instances in that one visit to the orphanage. On our way back I decided to take the back seat in the Innova car we were travelling in...I could not speak a word as I was struggling to cry without my parents hearing. All I could think of was the baby crying... the sound would just not leave my ears and I started spelling vows to myself on how I would devote a part of my time for the underprivileged. Those tears made so much sense and I knew that I was crying for a reason and the vows that I took made so much sense... a sense of purpose...

Whatever said and done how far have I been true to my vows! Under my mother’s guidance I realised that I have my boundaries as a student... I have a curfew time in my hostel, a time table to follow in my classes... So for the time being I have been away from my vows but I will live my dream once I become independent in life! Once I have the right to do things the way I want... The fire still burns in me and each time Mr. Vijay Menon speaks my vows are strengthened.

Yet another reality that Vijay Menon spoke about was an answer to the question how to kill ego! He said its simple... just visit the burns ward and the cancer ward! The feeling that life is not what we think it is kills the ego in you! Makes so much sense! Felt it myself! And for this simple reason I should I visit the orphanage frequently...frequently because ego rebounds!